client situation #615

20 Feb
2007

scheduled for 11am…we reached at 10.40 itself..! i would want to believe that whats i always do…if it wasnt for the cute secretary. its the smile that kills…always the friggin smile….

and then…when the dude has worked for some 18 odd years…why do they develop such a high respect for time. i mean..if the meeting is scheduled for 11…and 2 young consultants are having a happy chat with your secretary..why the hell do u have to come out of your cabin at sharp 11..!!

anyways…so whatever…! 18 yrs of experience…senior guy…! we got his time after multiple visits to the office…and it was only 30 mins. had the make the most of it.

so we start….and he is answering. the setting is quite corporat-ish..! you know…the table that can contain half the earth on it…and there is one old dude on its north. and 2 black-suited morons at its south. if both of us were to lie down and i were to hold on to his feet…we wud still need another body to reach the gentleman.

and whats with these chairs??? who do we hv to sink…and take ‘comfortable chairs’ to an all new level. not to mention tht the arm rest will rise up to half your thigh…! so u friggin need a forearm of shaq ‘o neil’s height..!

10 minutes into the interview…! the answers r stunning….i mean…experience oozing out..!! fantastic perspective.

beep…

its his phone…

he starts off infront of us itself. goes on and on..in some god damn vernacular. i cant figure shit…so am jst thinking of what next to ask. the interview seems too high a priority to spend time concentrating on something tht wud take an eternity for me to crack..!

“sorry gentleman..had to take this call..! please…lets continue”

the next 15 minutes flow smooth. good questions…equally brilliant answers…!

“thank you Mr X for your time. We really appreciate this”

“oh no…not a problem at all. I hope I was of help…! some tea?”

“So where are you guys from..?”

“OH i am fromt Delhi. stayed all my life there.”

“and you…?”

“I am from kerela..”

now…not that i want to…but i have never seen a person die of shock. i hv seen some bit of it in the movies..but thats all abt it. and i am told that the person freezes…! i mean…he jst becomes a statue.

yeah…on second thoughts…i did maybe see someone die of shock tht day…

“Kerela…??? So you can speak malayam…???”

“yes…i can…”

“OH I AM SO SORRY….I AM SO SO SORRY…I DIDNT MEAN IT…I REALLY AM. I JUST DIDNT MEAN IT…I AM…OH NO…GOD…SORRY…REALLY SORRY…”

“its ok…ok..not a problem at all..”

i am perplxed..!! what in friggin world i happenin. why is tht dude atleast 3 bodies away from us apologizing. and why is this super stud friend of mine acting as if he is jesus…out to forgive the world..! I have no friggin idea…i mean…NO IDEA….FRIGGIN..!!

we step out…and i am like….DUDE…WHAT JUST HAPPENED..??? WHY WAS HE ACTING LIKE THAT…

“remember the call…! he was speaking in malayalam. with someone frm home…i am guessing…”

“…and…???”

“…well….if i recollect correctly he said….these 2 f****** r wasting my time right now…moronic questions…thinking they r too smart..! I will make sure Srini doent grow up to become up…! friggin useless bunch of expensive furniture…”

___________________________________

ISB recruitments in full swing. had gone down this weekend…to a fanstastic time. took 5 super studs…great bunch of people. the tension on campus was scary…! all i could do was go back in history and laugh at my state back then. it all seems so miniscule…so irrelevant…now…

great learning…

~a

PS: OK…alright…this wasnt me…! A colleague..!! But heck…story writing is fun..! :)

11 Responses to client situation #615

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Alok

February 20th, 2007 at 3:01 pm

:) ha ha ha..

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ankur

February 20th, 2007 at 3:28 pm

Alok:
not so much fun for the client though…!!!

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Giks

February 21st, 2007 at 12:34 pm

really funny!! man – dont tell me u cant make out a mallu from his accent! ..i feel insulted hearing people simbly failing to spot our identity :-)

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ankur

February 21st, 2007 at 1:06 pm

giks:
i would have to agree with you. simbly..!! :)

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Arun Dhar

February 22nd, 2007 at 7:04 pm

Reminds me of my attempt to bargain with a store owner when buying a jacket in Chinatown in NY. When he offered it to me for $120 (“final, final offah!”), I called my friend who referred the place and said “Saala Chutiya hai yeh chapta bhen****, ek saw bees ka de raha hai.”

Minute later, I ended the phone call, turned to find him staring at me. His next words were “Ab boss, Do-Saw ka hi mile ga”

….(dumbfounded)…

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bijai

February 22nd, 2007 at 10:30 pm

hey.. totally funny..
being yet yanother simble mallu, i can totally relate :-)

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ankur

February 25th, 2007 at 11:07 pm

Ad:
Oouch..!! Reminds me of one such situation in Lansing. eyeing a girl who looked ‘non-indian’..!! some words in hindi..! and there..total image makeover..! :)

Bijai:
yeah…i am sure u can..! :)

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Kapil

February 26th, 2007 at 4:17 pm

ouch…tht must have stung..no wonder i dnt wanna b invisible anytime soon

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Suresh S

March 6th, 2007 at 12:09 am

Hi ankur,

mAn almost disappeared in to oblivion don’t u? But anyways gr8 to c u in action yaar! Keep writing more. Its friggin fun testing ur ‘story telling’ skills!

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ela1ne1

March 6th, 2007 at 12:28 pm

at last u admitted it didnt hapen to you < amadeus laugh;)>… think you need to keep me on call as your conscience.
also i want to talk to you come and meet me today please

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Faiz

March 9th, 2007 at 10:55 am

Hehehe … good stuff mann!

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