Earning respect

9 Feb

Your colleague invites you to her wedding, by sending a personal email with the invitation card attached 

Response 1:

Open the email 

Read it

Reply back 

“Thanks <insert colleague name> 

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. I am traveling and will unfortunately not be able to make it. Thanks for inviting me :)

Wishing you both a lovely wedding. All the best and God bless”

Response 2:

Open email

Open card

Read the details

Reply back 

“Thanks <insert colleague name>

Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. I am unfortunately traveling on the 19th and will be unable to make it. Sorry about that and thanks for inviting me 

Wish you and <insert bride’s name> a wonderful life ahead. All the best”

Time check

Response 2 > Response 1 by 10 seconds 

Respect check

Response 2 > Response 1 by infinity 

Respect doesn’t come from title. It comes from conduct. 

4 Responses to Earning respect


Abhishek J

February 12th, 2016 at 3:36 pm

Sorry Ankur, Couldn’t understand.
Apart from inserting the names, Response 1 and Response 2 are similar. I guess I am missing an important point. Can you elaborate.

Thanks in advance.



February 17th, 2016 at 4:55 pm

Ankur, what are you trying to say?

How are you defining respect here?

Email 1 and email 2 looks almost the same. It is just your perception that 1 is better than 2, right?

In either way, if you can’t make it to the wedding, what respect are you talking about? ;-)


Chandan Mittal

February 24th, 2016 at 11:00 am

@Rajat and @Abhishek J

As far as I could understand why response 2 earns more respect than response 1, is because

In response 2
1. You apologize for not being there in wedding, and
2. You take the time to notice the bride’s name from the invitation card and thus wish them by name, instead of the quick “Wish you both”.

You get my point? It takes about 10 more seconds to write response 2, but reflects that you have actually gone through the wedding card and really can’t make it to the wedding for a genuine reason.



March 14th, 2016 at 3:36 am

@Abhishek J

Response 1, is cold, too generic.

Response 2, shows interest, that you spent some time, and actually considered the invitation for the wedding. And are not a douche!

@Rajat Is it always the outcome that matters?

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