i normally think of myself as an emotionally strong person. yes…i am emotional…no doubt…! but then emotions have rarely influenced the way i behave…in a negative manner…or in a manner that is ‘not me’…

but not this time. something as gotten over me…! i just cant stop missing isb…i just cant get myself together. everyone back at delhi is questioning me…”what the hell is wrong with you”…and i hv no reply…! i really dont.

its surely not ISB per se….i know its the people…! i am missing the girls…i am missing the marketing guys…i am missing being in my room and being knocked at on the window…am missing listening to my music with the dimlight on…am missing the late night coversations with E…and the tickling of S…and the pranks with P…and teasing B on everything under the sun…

god….withdrawal sucks…!

the last night was torture. S’s parents…the girls…me and my parents had gone to paradise for dinner. came back arnd 10ish…picked up A on the way….and were hanging out at E’s place while she packed. remembering all that happened the past one yr…! it was depressing…! i just cudnt get myself to smile…! i cudnt get myself to feel ecited abt anything tht lay ahead of me. its was jst god damn depressing…

then we went for a brief walk to the pool…came back even more depressed. the flight was at 4.30…and it was 2.30 already. so G and S went to sleep. E and i went to my room…for the ‘last supper’…! i went abt my usual gyan…do this in dubai…dont do this…etc etc. and yah…while saying all tht…i had tears…! she cudnt stop herself as well…! it was agonizing..! i never thought i wud be feeling like this for someone…if one had asked me a yr back. the only thing worse…though far far worse…was talking to R the 1st night i spent alone at MSU. i remember what a vacuum i had felt tht time….and this last night at ISb reminded me of that…!

unfortunately…due to our delayed arrival at te airport…i didnt get a chance for a proper closure with E. and what sucks is that we wont meet again….for a yr now. i am meeting everyone else for the orientation…but she isnt coming.

anyways….life moves on…is what they say. and i wud believe them. an awesome yr of my life has come to an end…and i cant thank got enough for it. it was much much more than i ever thought it cud be….in more ways that anyone can ever imagine…

withdrawal sucks…

~a